Monday, December 21, 2015

Evidence of the Reality of God

*Warning: this is going to be VERY personal. Please read with love and understanding.*

Three short years ago, I thought my little family was finished. I honestly believed that a few short months after Christmas would see an end to my marriage. James and I had come to a place of being roommates rather than husband and wife. We had separated for a few weeks and I was DONE. I had decided I did not want to deal with our problems any more. I had come to a place where my anger towards my husband was so severe, NOTHING he did was right or good enough. EVERYTHING he did ticked me off and made me want to punch him in the throat. I was ready to walk away from my marriage and never look back--without any regrets.

I did not buy James a single present for Christmas. Samuel did, but I didn't. James got me something that he wanted and that only made me angry because it was what he wanted rather than something I wanted. I didn't even want James in the house let alone have him present while Samuel opened his Christmas presents that I had gotten for him.

Even my family back east did not want him anywhere near them. He was told that he was unwelcome at my parents' family gathering for Christmas. 

I will not apologize for my honesty. Every word in the truth and then some. It really was even worse than I am describing.

But God had other plans. I want you to know that it is ONLY by His grace and mercy that my family is not only together this Christmas, but that we are enjoying being together. As I watched my husband and son opening their presents earlier this evening, I was filled with overwhelming love for them both and great JOY at the fact that we are spending this special time TOGETHER.

I have not missed the Christmas miracle of these moments this year. God has restored my marriage--my family. No, things are not perfect between James and me, but I no longer hate him; I no longer want to punch him the throat just because he walks by; I no longer think that every single thing he does is wrong. I like being around him. He actually makes me laugh again. 

If you need any evidence of the reality of God, who He is, and of what He has done for us, look no further than at His Restoration of my little family. I am in awe as I sit here looking at the pictures we took tonight and how wonderful our time together has been this Christmas compared to just a short time ago. 

My prayer this Christmas is that you will all see--find--the true JOY of Jesus Christ and KNOW that He is REAL and He continues to work miracles in our lives--not just "Christmas" miracles--but miracles.

Thank you, Jesus!

Works Cited

Shen, Jean. "Series 1: Healing of Wounds of the Bride and Growing Intimacy with the Lord." Invitation to His Garden. Prophetic Art. Web. 6 Sept. 2014. <>.