noun
1. an excessively or blindly optimistic person.
adjective
2. (often lowercase). Also, Pollyannaish. unreasonably or illogically optimistic (www.dictionary.com)
In doing some research recently for my memoir, I looked up
the dictionary definition of my name and was unpleasantly surprised at what I
found: “excessively,” “unreasonably,”
and “illogically” optimistic?!
Seriously? Such negative
connotations in reference to optimism!
What in the world? My very first
reaction was that I was—and am—greatly offended by the dictionary
definition. My second reaction is that
somehow or another I have to find a way to get in touch with whoever creates
these definitions and begin a petition to get the definition changed. My third reaction is that it is no wonder
there are so many joy-stealers/joy-killers around me. Rather than seeing optimism as a positive or
good thing, people are conditioned even through definitions to see optimism as
something negative. So when someone
comes along with a “glass half-full” view of life, said person is ridiculed and
condemned for not seeing reality, for being “unreasonably” optimistic.
All my life I have dealt with joy-killers. It feels as if every time I have felt any
measure of joy in my life, there has been someone waiting to make sure that I
know how ridiculous it is for me to feel such joy. There has always been someone to bring me
down out of the clouds and help me plant my feet firmly on the ground. In spite of stories like The Neverending Story that teach that it is perfectly okay to dream
and live in another world, someone is always there, waiting to crush my spirit.
I imagine myself—and other optimists like me—walking through
life holding a giant bouquet of large, helium-filled balloons. (Think of the movie Up and you’ll come close to the number of balloons I see in this
bouquet.) My balloons are gorgeous. They are all colors, but there are more pinks
and purples than the rest because they are my favorite color. Not only are they all colors, they are all
variations of colors and some even sparkle with a few that glow. My bouquet is magical and it lifts me up into
the clouds on wings of joy.
Along comes a joy-killer with a bow and a quiver full of
arrows.
This joy-killer sees me in the
clouds with my amazing balloon bouquet and immediately lets an arrow fly,
popping at least a dozen of my balloons with one shot. The joy-killer doesn’t stop there. No.
The joy-killer won’t be satisfied until every single balloon is popped
and I am back with my feet planted firmly on the ground.
As my balloons pop, I plummet towards the earth. When I land, I hit hard, breaking bones,
bruising parts of my body I wasn’t even aware could be bruised. Not one balloon survived. I am surrounded by broken pieces of my once
beautiful balloon bouquet. The sorrow
and sadness well up in me to the point of pure rage, but the joy-killer is
strutting around demanding to acknowledgment and thanks for having saved me—rather
than having harmed me.
No one helps me up. A
few around me feel sorry to see my beautiful bouquet destroyed, but they all
believe that the joy-killer has saved me.
Only I know how destructive the joy-killer's arrows have
been. Only I feel the aches and pains in
my body. I am alone as the sadness
settles over me now as a warm, comfortable blanket. I wrap it around myself and shuffle away, isolated
and dejected.
Why? Why is it that
there are those who would rather we all walk around looking dejected rather than
with smiles on our faces? Why is it
better to be sad or angry than it is to be filled with joy? Why does the glass have to be half-empty
rather than half-full? Why does even the
definition of a “Pollyanna” have to filled with such negative connotations as “unreasonably” or “illogically”
optimistic? What in the world is so very
wrong with being optimistic?
My Bible tells me to
be FULL of the JOY of the Lord. I am
told in
my Bible to serve the Lord ENTHUSIASTICALLY. (See my previous posts for the scripture
references.) Jesus himself was a man of
Joy and laughter. Jesus was also
criticized for being a man of Joy and murdered upon a cross because He was full
of life, love, and joy.
So go ahead and
criticize me. You go right on ahead and
pop the balloons of my joy bouquet. You
go ahead and try to keep me down, bruised and broken. Go ahead, joy-killer and knock me down. Go right on ahead.
Just like my Lord and
Savior who rose again, I will get up again.
I will have a new, more beautiful bouquet than I had before. My balloons will be bigger. They will be even more colorful. I will fly higher in the clouds on wings of
joy than I did previously. Joy-killer,
you may do everything in your power to knock me down and keep me under my
blanket of sadness, but I am POLLYANNA and I will throw off that blanket and
take hold of my beautiful balloon bouquet and rise above you……!!!!!!
8 “We
are pressed on every side by troubles, but we are not crushed. We are
perplexed, but not driven to despair. 9 We are hunted down, but never abandoned by God.
We get knocked down, but we are not destroyed. 10 Through suffering, our bodies continue to share
in the death of Jesus so that the life of Jesus may also be seen in our bodies.”
(2 Corinthians 4:8-10, NLT)
My ex husband always called me Pollyanna in a mocking way. What he didnt know was I took it as a compliment. Life has beaten the Pollyanna out of me but for some reason I feel the desire to live up to my nickname . So proud of that nickname and praying that I can get back to my former bright positive happy self. Be proud of your name Polly
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